i love love love them. i look so darling with bangs and i feel so much better about my hair. i was having such an ugly day yesterday. felt fat and my hair just looked a mess. but today is a brand new day and i'm feeling awesome! minus the sweating i've been doing from this wonderful heat wave we're having. i hate summer. it kills me. being a bigger girl and being in the heat is like...putting me in an oven. i sweat so much it makes me grumpy. but i'm trying to ignore that right and think of tonight! patrick and i are going to asbury park to walk the walk of art, my salon is number 22 on it, so i gotta find a map so we can go around. and im hoping to go on the boardwalk and take some beautiful pictures of asbury. it's starting to look so nice. too bad the benny's are going to trash it. stupid hookers.

well, here are some pictures of my new lovely hair 'do!

i think i have a serious problem when it comes to guys. i tend to lead them on then break their hearts. why do i do this? i don't know. i know part of it is the attention i get. the things they say just make me smile and i can just imagine what would happen if those things were to happen. what if someone did the same exact thing to me? i'd be crushed. it's really something i can't help but i want to stop. basically, here's the deal. i'm in love with my ex-boyfriend patrick. never stopped loving him. he broke off his engagement to be with me, picked a school closer to me, and moved closer. basically, changed almost his entire life for me. i tend to make things worse then they really are when i tell my friends which makes them say, "Hey Kristina! don't go back with him!". i'm the one who blows shit out of proportion. i freak if i don't hear from him. this is becuase i have a trust issue with him, and it's really something i need to get over.  he's a different person then he was 5 years ago. i'm not even going to go into anything because well, it's none of anyone's business but my own and his. so anywho, i've been leading this other guy, will, on. i feel like an absolute bitch for doing so but, i must admit, i like the attention. will lives 2 hours away so even if we did date, i'd only get to see him once a week or once every two weeks, etc. he's been telling me he wants to marry me and he's so in love with me. kinda freaky, but i've just been playing along with it. i don't want to be with him, but how do i tell him? it's going to crush him. so basically, that takes me to the part of how i'm a huge bitch. could you see why i'm a huge bitch? yeah, this isn't the first time i've done this shit.

it's nice to sit here and type my problems. just wish somehow magically after you've written down all your problems, or in my case typed, some magic fairy would appear and go make all your stupid, idiotic problems go away. especially the big huge problems you caused yourself. how awesome would that be? yep. totally awesome.

the upside in my life, i got a job in a salon (finally!!!!) and i actually think i'm really going to like it at this salon. it's very trendy, which i love. i can wear anything i want! they have freestanding sinks! this makes me excited because, i have a bad back. freestanding sinks take that stress off your back. and they move!!!!! there's also this little chiuaua or however you spell it, named cash. he's so cute! he hangs out in the salon all day saying hi to people when they come in. i'm telling you, this is the place for me. i'll be an assistant for however long john thinks i should be, he'll let me know when i'm ready, and he'll give me my chair! which he has waiting for me! so, i am working 2 jobs now. which shouldn't be that bad. 43 hours with two days off. hells yes. i'm going to be bringing in the dough! i can't wait to save up some money and move the frick out! maybe i'll let a certain someone move in with me......